Star Canine Lucy Vonnegut Kicks Off 2013 for Whom You Know! She Laments Her Ignored Requests to Santa and Contemplates Her 2013 Resolutions...Thank You Lucy For Filling In Today!
From the Desk of Lucy
(SOME people were out quite late and need me to write today...you know how it is dahlings and girls about town everywhere. Note that Norb, my human, finally got my Facebook fan page in order so do hit like since there's not a love button-Bradley Cooper are you reading:
https://www.facebook.com/NorbVonnegutsDog)
Peachy,
I was so bummed Christmas morning. No little sister in my stocking or under the tree—after my letter to Santa Claus and all my hard work? Do you think it’s because I ate his cookies and knocked over his milk? I didn’t ask for anything big, nothing over 30 pounds. But no—didn’t happen.
What can a girl do but move on?
Which is why I’m sending a list of my New Year’s Resolutions. Can you take a Peachy peek and let me know if I’ve missed anything. Here’s what I’m thinking: get organized and come out of the gate strong. Don’t look back. Keep my eyes on the prize because 2013 is the year I get a playmate. There’s no way that fat old man from the North Pole can overlook me next year.
Oops. Did I say that? I sound like a cat, and we both know that’s a big, “Ewwww.”
Seriously, Peachy girl, what do you think?
10. Stop cleaning myself in front of guests. This one was tough, because I don’t see the big deal. I think people are jealous because we can and they can’t.
9. No more eating the Christmas ornaments. Thank goodness the tree is coming down any day. Those little balls are adorable.
8. No standing by the door and waiting to go out every five minutes. Norb tells me I should audition for one of those television commercials that advertise relief for weak bladders.
7. No more growling at the neighbors when they visit. Why not? It’s my house.
6. No more running down to the rock beach and barking at the fish when Norb says, “It’s time for dinner….”
5. No more rooting through the dirty clothes and digging out Norb’s boxers. I mean—what does he expect? Spanx don’t do a thing for me. Those Look-At-Me leggings—give me a break. Why don’t you look at me chew something I can sink my teeth into.
You know what? Or is that you “no” what? Bump this nonsense. I feel like telling these resolutions, “Bite me.” Everything is no, no, no and more no. If I do these all these things, I mean if I don’t do them, 2013 will be bore, bore, boring.
“You better watch out,” they say. Or “You better not pout….”
I’ll show Santa there’s more than one way to skin a cat. (Doesn’t that expression make your knees knock something fierce?) All my good behavior didn’t do a thing during 2012. Well, I intend to do something different until this Thelma gets her Louise. Remember that movie? That’s when Brad was young and yummy.
Time to let it all hang out.
You think my Hollywood girlfriends are naughty? I’m talking about Paris and Lindsay what’s her face. Peachy girl, you haven’t seen anything yet. I’m the new me.
Let’s see. Where to start? Norb left a sandwich on the kitchen counter, and the hamper looks full. Ruff, I think 2013 is sounding better all the time. Whom You Know Readers around the world, on behalf of Peachy and me we wish you the best that life has to offer in 2013! Hopefully this year I'll come out with a book or at least interact with that Grove character...but not sure my friends, I think the big screen is more my style...
Tootles and XOXO, Lucy
PS In case you missed it earlier, just like me you know you do already!
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More of how We Love Lucy:
Lucy's Debut:
Pre-makeover Lucy:
Post-makeover Lucy:
Lucy battling Sandy:
Halloween Lucy:
Lucy's Letter to Santa:
-a note from the Editor-
We highly encourage you to read all works by Norb Vonnegut - in fact, make it your New Year's Resolution to read them all:
-a note from Lucy-
Just buy his books. Buy them for you. Buy them for your friends. It will make my allowance bigger so more 2013 outfits...I need to maintain my standard of cute.